Why Shame Increases Loss of Control Over Alcohol and How to Manage Shame (E87)
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Gill discusses shame. We talked about shame way back in episode 7 and learned that there is a clear link between experiencing shame and relapsing. In this episode you’ll learn about the difference between people who are guilt-prone and those who are shame-prone and how that impacts their drinking. She has so many interesting studies to share about the link between shame, loss of control over drinking and developing a problem, and some studies that may explain why some of us are prone to feeling shame instead of guilt. You will also hear the story of Gill's first drink and some insight on how to potentially manage shame in the future.
What to listen to next:
E7: Shame
E54: Neuroplasticity and Using Alcohol to Escape or Numb Out
E35: Emotional Sobriety
E19: Alcohol Use Disorder and Other Mental Health Conditions
E60: How Alcohol Affects Our Cognitive Abilities
The most impactful thing I learned from researching this episode on shame is this quote from one of the papers I discussed:
“Both alcohol use-related shame and guilt appear to be positively associated with the contemplation of changing one’s alcohol use-related behaviors. Only alcohol use-related guilt was clearly linked to the taking of action to address problematic drinking behavior.”
We both think about not drinking, but only guilt-prone people are able to actually take action on their feelings. Shame-prone people stay stuck in the cycle and I think this is because of all the things that were associated with being a shame-prone person that were not found in guilt-prone people:
Increased anger
Impaired control
Negative urgency (escapism)
Impulsivity
Less cognitive control
Reduced ability to regulate emotions
Reduced ability to recognize happiness in others
Maladaptive coping strategies (like drinking)
Avoidance
If you're struggling with shame, then I think the best thing you can do for yourself is to work on managing your emotions and understanding what you feel, what set you off, and learning to become aware of your triggers. I recommend doing this work with a therapist, because if we don't address our inability to handle things then we will either keep going back to drinking or pick up something else self-destructive like emotional eating.
Sources
S.L. Woien, H.A.H. Ernst, J.A. Patock-Peckham, C.T. Nagoshi. Validation of the TOSCA to measure shame and guilt. Personality and Individual Differences, 35 (2003), pp. 313-326
R.L. Dearing, J. Stuewig, J.P. Tangney. On the importance of distinguishing shame from guilt: Relations to problematic alcohol and drug use. Addictive Behaviors, 30 (2005), pp. 1392-1404
Patock-Peckham, J. et al. Shame is bad and guilt is good: an examination of the impaired control over drinking pathway to alcohol use and related problems. Personality and Individual Differences. 121:62-66. 2018
Treeby, M., Prado, C., Rice, S., & Crowe, S. (2015). Shame, guilt, and facial emotion processing: initial evidence for a positive relationship between guilt-proneness and facial emotion recognition ability Cognition and Emotion, 1-8
Jarrett, C. Guilt-prone people are highly skilled at recognising other people’s emotions. BPS Research Digest. 2015
Matt S. Treeby, Simon M. Rice, Michael J. Wilson, Simon F. Crowe, David Kealy, Catherine E. Prado & Raimondo Bruno (2021) Are shame and guilt personality styles associated with different alcohol use-related outcome expectancies?, Journal of Substance Use
Treeby, M. et al. Measuring Alcohol Use-Related Shame and Guilt: Development and Validation of the Perceptions of Drinking Scale. Substance Use & Misuse, 55:3, 441-451. 2020
Cite this episode
Tietz, G. Episode 87: Why Shame Increases Loss of Control Over Alcohol and How to Manage Shame. Sober Powered. 2022.
